Social Notworking.

Facebook. Zuckerberg's finest. A cash-cow so large that if it had a whiff of oil about it, the U.S. would've invaded it, and France surrendered to it. It is of course a massive part of our lives, almost unfortunately. On a personal level, I no longer 'like' Facebook. It's not because I'm trying to be a massive bellend and prove how hipster I am by pushing my Foursquare account on you, but rather because I feel Facebook is wasted on the youth of today.

The youth of today, myself included, are meant to be at that stage in life where you take the world by the horns and you ride it like Major Kong atop the atom bomb in Dr. Strangelove. You straddle it and scream and whoop and cheer as you enjoy the weightlessness, freedom and explosive power of the outside world. In theory, Facebook should be the perfect place in order to document your life's experiences. However, I don't think this is the case. Once again, we are to blame. Us. The networks of people who own Facebook accounts.

Now, I know I've been a tad cryptic, but here is my point. The human ego cannot function without giving in to the temptation of gossip, judgement and jealousy. They are a necessary evil; a preprogrammed set of basic survival instincts that nowadays are about as much use as McAfee's Security Software 2002. They are a leftover imperfection that evolution is still yet to strain out, and Facebook just happens to provide the most ideal place for these emotions, and many others like them, to breed and sustain. Facebook should be a catalogue of memories, but in reality, it is a catwalk on which people stroll. They dress up in their Sunday finest, create posts that try to emote a sense of 'look how brilliant I am', and await to be judged by crowd. The youth of today have stopped attempting to create memories and relive experiences, and rather try to keep the crowd happy. The crowd consisting of close friends, friends, old classmates, friends of old classmates, that girl you met at that barbecue, the groups of boys who you played pool against in the pub 2 years ago, your entire family, complete with 10 year old cousins on their own accounts, the people in that job you did for 2 months, everyone you met in Freshers Week, everyone you didn't meet in Freshers Week, everyone. Hundreds, thousands of people, most of whom you have barely met, let alone think about on a daily basis. And yet, people are obsessed with trying to appease every single last one of these people. The second a new trend comes out, you must buy into it, take photos with other people who have done the same thing, throw a few empty bottles around the place and call yourself a socialite party-goer. They will pay and sacrifice themselves to try and please a crowd of people who will give them no more than 10 seconds of their time surfing on their iPhone 5S's with the custom bunny case that they bought from a shop that neither you or they had ever heard of. It's utter madness.

I'd given up hope for Facebook, especially since it started catering for the more 'successful' Facebookers by allowing funny videos, pictures and the like to be 'shared' and these people 'followed'. But, and not for the first time, school came to the rescue, namely in the form of my old head of Sixth Form. Scrolling through his page (it was his birthday today, he had his fair share of 10 seconds from me), it quickly became apparent that he has possibly the best Facebook page I have ever seen. I cast an eye over the names who had wished him a happy birthday; old friends, new friends, ex-students, teachers of old, teachers of new. His recent photos included trips to Australia, trips to his allotment, trips out with his family, his ageing mother on her 92nd birthday. It blew me away at how fantastically he had used his small segment of the internet. He filled it with memories, filled it with small links to once forgotten old friends. He was not out to judge, and he was not out to become a successful, multi-thousand follower idiot. He had his life, past, present and future, displayed intently in front of him. I think most people nowadays have their Facebook account aimed for the viewing pleasure of others. He had his Facebook account for himself, and it is fantastically humbling to see.

I am guilty of gearing my Facebook account towards the views of others. I'm pretty sure nearly everyone my age can be accused of doing the same. My proposal is not that Facebook is flawed, but rather we are too young to enjoy Facebook. My old head of Sixth Form has enjoyed a fantastic life, and was keen to display his memories, allowing others to peek in and enjoy his experiences with him. The younger generations are too filled with the preoccupations of envy, jealousy and judgement to enjoy Facebook properly. We are at the age where we should be creating memories, not judging iffy fashions or fads. Therefore, in Sam's Britain, Facebookers will have a minimum age of 50. Vote Williams for Cardiff.